GraceWaves Articles

Let your gracious kindness be evident to all. Philippians 4:5

Dear Darlene,

Let’s begin with what I know about you. Most importantly, you are my birth mother. I know that you were single when I came along; that you had at least two other children by your deceased husband; and that I was the unintended result of a relationship you had with my birth father about whom I know nothing of practical value.

I know that you realized that having a baby in your situation in 1958 would have been a challenge to say the least. Also I know that you developed a plan to find a good home for me, and that you did a very good job in that task. That’s really about it.

The reason I am writing you now is three-fold. First, I want to thank you for giving me the chance to live. I’m not sure that abortion was an option for you back then, but obviously it was not your personal choice. I’m glad. Life is good and precious, God’s greatest gift. You chose to let me enjoy that gift. Thank you.

Second, I want to let you know that I am fine. I suppose every February 13 you must wonder what happened to me. Well, I have turned out very happy and fairly normal depending on whom you ask. You made a good choice in Bill and Dottie Ellis. They are both deceased now, but I could not have had a better set of parents. You need to know that. Whatever good or worthwhile I have accomplished is due in no small degree to their love and wisdom. They gave me a good foundation, and on that I have built a life that is positive and, I hope, fruitful.

Third, and this may be most important for you, I want to relieve you of any doubt you may feel about your decision. Over the years I have noted what others have said about the “adoption experience of the child,” and I have to say that it puzzles me. I have never felt a sense of loss because you allowed me to be adopted. It was a gift that I could do with whatever I wanted. I chose to see it as a wholly good thing. It made me unique. Again, I am sure that Bill and Dottie helped me to interpret it that way, but you need to know that I have.

So, don’t worry about birthdays being a problem for me. Or Mother’s Day. Or Father’s day. I have never had any discernible sense of guilt or shame, grief or any identity crisis. I don’t want this to hurt your feelings, but I really did not spend a great deal of time thinking about you. I think that is the way you would want it. I know who my parents are, and they were terrific. When I do think about you I realize that your decision must have been a very hard one, and I cannot relate to what it must be like to conceive a child and then give it up. But to me your decision has always been courageous and selfless.

You are a hero to me, Darlene. And if this message could in some way find you in the twilight of life, I pray it is for you a benediction that will relieve you of any burden you have carried over these years.

I cannot say that everyone who is adopted feels the same way. Feelings and human personality usually defy strict categories and sure predictions. I’m writing about me. And you. You did a good thing. Thank you.

Grace,

Dr. Terry Ellis

October 20, 2013

When I say, “I am a Christian”
I’m not shouting, “I’ve been saved!”
I’m whispering, “I get lost sometimes
That’s why I chose this way”

When I say, “I am a Christian”
I don’t speak with human pride
I’m confessing that I stumble -
needing God to be my guide

When I say, “I am a Christian”
I’m not trying to be strong
I’m professing that I’m weak
and pray for strength to carry on

When I say, “I am a Christian”
I’m not bragging of success
I’m admitting that I’ve failed
and cannot ever pay the debt

When I say, “I am a Christian”
I don’t think I know it all
I submit to my confusion
asking humbly to be taught

When I say, “I am a Christian”
I’m not claiming to be perfect
My flaws are far too visible
but God believes I’m worth it

When I say, “I am a Christian”
I still feel the sting of pain
I have my share of heartache
which is why I seek God’s name

When I say, “I am a Christian”
I do not wish to judge
I have no authority
I only know I’m loved

Grace,

Dr, Terry Ellis

“Then I said ‘How long, O Lord?’” Isaiah 6:11

“How long, O Lord?” comes from Isaiah 6:11. In his temple vision Isaiah saw the Lord “high and lifted up.” During that truly awesome encounter God asked “Whom shall I send?” The times were perilous, and the people needed a prophet. Isaiah enthusiastically answered the call: “Here am I. Send me!” His response was courageous and faithful. After hearing the assignment, Isaiah asked a question “how long, O Lord?”

The book of Isaiah chronicles his long obedience. He stayed the course even when it was unpopular. His question did not hint at doubt or reluctance. He wasn’t looking for a two-week mission trip. He was in it for a lifetime, if needed.

But when we ask “how long, O Lord?” we often do so hoping that the light is at the end of the tunnel, and that that light is not an oncoming train! How long? is the question we ask when the diagnosis is hard. Or the relationship is in trouble. Or the stock market takes away a good percentage of our investments. How long, O Lord? is really a question about when and if God will intervene. And it actually focuses on us. “How much longer do I have to put up with this?”

There is often no answer to that question. The choices people make may not be good or right, and that extends our misery. The medicine sometimes does not work. The problems you face often turn into long-term dull aches. Who can tell when it will end?

The one choice available to you is an affirmation of faith found in the words “however long, O Lord.” Say that and mean it, and you affirm your commitment to God no matter what. However long it takes, you will remain faithful. Whatever comes along, you will remain faithful. No matter how hard the way, you will trust God, for He is always on your side.

“How long, O Lord?” is understandable, but ultimately fruitless. You simply don’t know. “However long, O Lord” puts you on firm footing to bear whatever comes your way. This is the faith you need.

Grace,

Dr. Terry Ellis

September 15, 2013

“Be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus.” 2 Timothy 2:1

You will be strong in something today. One quality, characteristic, or pattern of thought will dominate all others. At the end of this day you will have been shaped by what you were strong in during this day. It may be something good that has shaped you, or it may be something bad. Let’s look at a few candidates.

You may be strong in fear. Each day presents plenty of opportunities for fear, and no one can dispute the reality of possible storms. Fear is a natural and normal response to these uncertainties. But will you be strong in fear?

You may be strong in resentment. Everyone of us collects people along the way that have been unkind or worse. The mention of a name may bring to your mind a rush of images and well-rehearsed stories. There’s a certain perverse joy in hate. It gives you energy. very costly energy, of course, but energy nevertheless. Resentment is an typicalresponse. But will you be strong in resentment today?

I could go on and describing anger, doubt, arrogance, etc. These corrosive qualities are fairly common. We all experience them, and tend to underestimate their effect. The question remains, will you be strong in one of them today?

Paul wrote two letters to a young minister named Timothy who was struggling in many ways. These two letters contain a dozen or more exhortations and encouragements. Among them is the one listed above: “be strong in the grace of Christ Jesus.” Paul knew that every day Timothy would give in to his problems or embrace God’s promise.

God knows that about you also. When you are strong in the grace of Christ Jesus, you are less likely to feed your fears, or give too much power to your problems, or too much weight to your critics. Being strong in grace means that you will receive God’s grace and give it more freely. Being strong in His grace means that you know He will work in your life and bring you through any problem. Being strong in grace means stepping out of the storm and into the security of God’s presence and power.

The good news is that God gives you the power to choose. Through Jesus Christi you can be stronger in grace than anything else.

Grace,

Dr. Terry Ellis

September 1, 2013

“A righteous man falls seven times, and rises again.” Proverbs 24:16

Success and failure are unavoidable parts of life. They follow one another inexorably. That is part of Solomon’s wisdom. We love to focus on the fact that the man who falls seven times gets up a seventh time, but there is so much more to this proverb than simply getting up. It teaches us a great deal about life.

Think of where you are in life right now. Is it a pleasant time? Or is it harsh? A mixture of both? Now think of how many times you have experienced both spiritual highs and lows. That number far exceeds seven. It is probably countless.

Let’s look closer at the experiences of falling down and getting up. Falling down often happens by your own hand. You have made a mistake. You’re facing the consequences of some bad decisions. We all bear the scars of tripping over our own feet.

Other times the fall is simply a matter of the difficulties of life. Something goes wrong with someone close to you. Or your company downsizes. Someone dies. The ways life can beat you up are endless. Sometimes you feel as if getting beaten up is your only experience.

The good news is that God always gives us the necessary strength to rise again. I believe God fills in where we are weakest. He takes our best and raises it to adequacy. In other words, He wants us to exercise our faith to the very best of our ability to rise again. But some of you reading this right now feel so “fallen” that you are close to giving up. God fills in where you fall short. He bears you up. He keeps you in the palm of His hand. He lifts your head above the discouragement.

We are all involved in the endless rhythm of falling down and rising again. This means the spiritual low points are not a final verdict on your value as a human being. But neither are the highs a guarantee of having ultimately and finally made it. No one is bad enough to fall beyond God’s reach. No one is good enough to avoid falling. We all simply have to get up after we fall.

Winston Churchill said “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” He sounds like Solomon three thousand years later.

What we must cultivate is a trusting determination and courage to continue. You may have already tried and become discouraged. You have no real choice but to try again. It’s time. Reclaim your faith, rise to your knees, and then stand as the son or daughter God made you to be.

Grace,

Dr. Terry Ellis

August 27, 2013

“Blessed are those who have not seen, yet believe.” John 20:29

Have you ever taken a leap of faith? The “leap of faith” is a commonly used phrase to describe the final act of a person to believe that a particular direction is in keeping with God’s will. It apparently dates back to Kierkegaard, who actually wrote “leap to faith.” The phrase was his description of the final act of will to embrace the paradoxes of the Christian faith.

In other words, you take a leap of faith when the commitment seems unlikely, un-provable, or counter-intuitive. We come to the end of a process of analysis and find a cliff. Something does not make sense. At that point, you embrace faith and make the leap.

Now have you ever made a leap of faith? I have to say, I can’t think of a time when I have. That may surprise you, but after hearing the phrase a number of times in different contexts, I believe it is overused and misapplied. Let me explain.

To say that we often must make a leap of faith implies that God has left a great chasm between you and the truth or direction you seek. But is that the case? Not at all. Yes, some aspects of the Christian life require tremendous trust and commitment, but I don’t find any of the Christian life or faith lacking considerable empirical support.

Even at the beginning of faith, when a person first commits to Christ, even that act is not really a leap against all logic and evidence. When faced squarely, sin has made a mess of our lives, we cannot adequately “forgive ourselves,” communion with a holy and perfect God is beyond our ability. Those few bits of rational evidence lead me to believe that we do need a Savior, and if I survey history there was one Man who lived a sinless life, assured us of a good and loving God, and offered forgiveness through His death. Then, of course, we have the empirical evidence of His resurrection. Are we really left at that point with a giant chasm that defies reason? Not at all. So the leap of faith may not really be a leap at all, just a step toward God in which we move away from self and into His embrace.

Now I do not want to quibble with the phrase when used on the grand scale of salvation, but I do want to object to its rather common use to describe many decisions and commitments we make as Christians. Staying faithful to your spouse is not a leap of faith. Neither is attending church, or tithing, or acting with integrity in your business. Forsaking gossip is not a leap of faith. Living graciously and showing kindness do not require a leap of faith.

There are many times when we must take a step of faith that brings us closer to God’s will in our lives, but even at that point God has given us tremendous encouragement and proof. For example, remember the power of scripture: “the word of our God will stand forever” (Isa. 40:8), and “the word of God is living and active” (Heb. 12). If a particular direction is in keeping with the principles we find in God’s word, then you do not need to make a leap of faith. Or pay attention to the counsel of trusted Christian friends. God often speaks through His servants to His servants (Prov. 15:22). I rely heavily on grace-filled brothers and sisters in Christ to offer wise counsel.

Too often we are like the rich man in Luke 16 who, after his death, begged Abraham to send Lazarus to his family to warn them. Abraham’s response is that God already had provided sufficient direction. Signs would not help when faith is required. We may want signs, but God provide signposts. In fact, I find these all around me, showing me the directions I must go.

So I prefer the phrase “a step of faith” to “a leap of faith” because I simply do not think that God often requires us to do something that is utter nonsense. We use the spiritual gifts of discernment, wisdom, knowledge, and, yes, faith to submit one other area of our lives more deeply to God’s will and purpose. So do not wait for signs of what you should do. Jesus discouraged this. But look for the signposts. They are clear. Follow them, step by step into the joy for which your Father created you.

Grace,

Dr. Terry Ellis

July 14, 2013

“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 2:5

We usually think of habits as actions we repeatedly take. They are part of our schedule and routine. Exercising, eating, shopping for groceries, reading the newspaper, etc. We truly are creatures of habit. Routine works well for most of us.

More important than the physical habits, however, are the mental habits we fall into or consciously develop. These are the “mind habits,” or the usual ways we think. Scientists call mind habits our cognitive style.

In the NT we find many references to the mind and the way we think. Paul, a philosopher/theologian, used the terms for mind and thinking frequently some 23 times in his letters. Typical is our verse from Philippians for this week’s GraceWaves: “have this mind in you, which was also in Christ Jesus.” The word connotes an attitude or disposition based on careful and continual thought.

Broadly, Paul wrote of the mind in two important ways. First is the idea that God transforms our minds. The best known example of this is “be transformed by the renewal of your mind” (Rom. 12:2). God is obviously the one who does the transforming in this instance. Without question God is at work in you. Changing your mind habits is partly God’s responsibility.

The second and more common way Paul wrote of thinking is exhorting readers adopt certain habits of the mind. That is the emphasis throughout Philippians. We bring effort and discipline to our minds. We have a role in forming our mind habits.

Think of it as walking across your yard. If you walk the same path repeatedly day after day you will wear a path. You may walk a different way occasionally, but your habit is to go one particular way.

The same is true of your thinking. We develop “pathways” that become our mind habits, and Paul wrote repeatedly of disciplining our minds to think in ways that honor God. Consequently these godly mind habits are healthier for us. This is very important for several reasons.

First, many people don’t realize they have a role in changing their thinking. It’s enormously difficult, but very possible to develop new habits of the mind that are much holier and healthier. Not everyone has the same ability to do this, and we all face obstacles. Some people have depression. Others have a family history of negative and critical attitudes. Nevertheless, difficulty does not mean impossibility. Whatever the obstacles, you still have tremendous power to develop your mind habits.

Second, your pattern of thinking is self-fulfilling. Two students can fail an exam. One thinks “I’m awful. I am a failure.” The other thinks, “I have to study harder or in a different way next time.” They have both set a mental trajectory that is linked to their future actions and results. Having a good and hopeful opinion of yourself is not egotistical. In fact, based on what we read in the Bible, it is very much like God’s opinion of you.

Third, your mind habits are contagious. Gerald Haeffel and Jennifer Hames, two Notre Dame psychologists, recently published a paper based on a very large study. They found negative temperaments tend to drag down people around them. No surprise there. But the very heartening discovery was that an upbeat temperament lifted people and helped them to be most positive and hopeful. Which would you prefer?

Now back to the NT text. To have the mind of Christ we must know the mind of Christ. His temperament, and I say this reverently, is grace-filled and eternally hopeful. Now that we know, or are reminded, that our mind habits are both malleable and effectual let’s be about the business of changing them to be more like Christ’s.

Grace,

Dr. Terry Ellis

July 8, 2013

“Not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some.” Hebrews 10:25

“So I have to” seems always to kill grace. After all, “If I have to, then it must not be grace.” Clever teenagers have been going down this route for centuries (or at least since I was a teenager). We try to work guilt into the equation. Mom used reverse guilt on me. One Sunday after my whining complaints about going to church she said, “Then never mind. I don’t want to feel like a warden.” I felt so guilty I went into the ministry.

Not a single parent drawing breath has not struggled with this issue. “Will I make my child hate church if I make her go now?” First of all, you’re not responsible for what your child feels about church ten years down the road. You are responsible for doing what is right for your child while he or she lives with you. So, here are a few grace-filled reasons for taking your child to church.

1. It’s a commandment. That’s right. One of the first 10 rules God set up is that one day should be different from all others. The Creator programmed us with a need to worship, not for Him but for us. We are souls, not really possessing a soul, but being a soul. We are spiritual in nature. To neglect that part is to starve ourselves. Increasingly the other six days are ganging up on Sunday, and you will have to fight traveling soccer teams, and “the only day we have to ourselves,” etc. But keep fighting. Your child needs it, and so do you.

2. We need stillness. The church should be a place for reverence and a sense of holiness. That’s why I prefer sanctuary to “worship center.” We need holy places and holy times. Probably the most constant complaint you will face from your omniscient teenager is that church is boring. They’re right!! When you compare us to Beyonce or One Direction, we are boring. The very worst thing you can do as a parent is to plead with the ministers to somehow make the worship service more interesting and fun for children and youth. It’s a perfect wedge issue. Your child pledges to want to go to church if only the church would be more like Disney World. So, you come to us and want us to be entertaining. Sorry, eternal is the key. Not entertainment.

3. Your child needs community. We can’t worship in separate demographic groups and have anything vaguely resembling a church. We need children and youth ministries with plenty of activities, but one hour a week, teens need to stand next to senior adults, and singles with married families, and all God’s children need to sing Worship the King and hear a message from an ancient and timeless book. The young need our wisdom, and the elders need the energy and imagination of youth, just as much as the eye needs the ear and the head needs the feet. Worship is the best way to give expression to our unity in Christ.

4. Everyone needs Jesus. Many things become clearer and clearer as I get older, and this simple truth is among them. I don’t care who you are or where you are in life, you need Jesus. Your child simply will not learn about the love of God anywhere else. He will not learn the books of the Bible (how many adults today wish they knew more about the Bible?). They will not grow up with the familiar Bible stories and see new meaning as they go through the years. You can’t learn to look at life through the eyes of Jesus unless you spend regular time with Him.

I enjoy church. I really do. And I’ve never been in a worship service where I didn’t find something eternal and sustaining. Not making your child go to church ironically deprives them of a grace they are likely to need that week.

Keep up the struggle. All parents have fought this battle. Someday your child will thank you for your dedication.

Grace,

Dr. Terry Ellis

June 10, 2013

“Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day’s own trouble be sufficient for the day.” Matthew 6:34

Jesus had as much or more to say about trouble, anxiety, worry, etc. in the Sermon on the Mount than any other single topic. 6:25-34 focuses exclusively on this theme and 6:19-24 serves as a foundation to describe the causes and solutions.

In fact, somewhat surprisingly we do not find in Jesus words in the Sermon on the Mount much material that constitutes what might be thought of as “traditional theology.” Jesus did not discuss God’s nature and attributes, or the Spirit’s activities, or even His own atonement. His topics were very life-centered, aimed generally at the things that get between us and God.

Trouble is certainly a common obstruction. Whatever the trouble is we tend to think of it as a referendum on God. That is, if He cared enough for me He would remove the problem. Or because He has not removed the problem then perhaps He’s not all He’s cracked up to be.

This topic can take volumes to address, but let me try to shed a little light on two of the most basic ways we can positively approach trouble, and both suggestions come directly the context of Jesus’ teaching (always a good place to start).

First, our focus must definitely be on Jesus. The teaching in 6:16-24 sets the foundation for Jesus’ extended treatment of worry. He used three illustrations to make the same point. First, we are to store up treasures in heaven as opposed to earthly treasures (6:16-21). We surely know this is true, but having a roof over our heads, a car that starts, and the latest smart phone are simply hugely important! Jesus always emphasized relationships over things. Find a way to serve someone today. That will be far more eternal than purchasing another gadget.

Physical needs always shout louder than spiritual necessities. An unfortunate side-effect is useless anxiety over the things. Which by the way, things almost always work out. Don’t live your life by the exceptions. God gives enough blessings to get through each day and they are almost always found in the people around you.

The second illustration in the foundation having a “sound eye” (6:22-23). The word literally means single, so the focus is literally on focus. Look to God to gauge your actions and thoughts. Again in a terrible irony, the world screams, God whispers. To stay with the light analogy the world is Vegas, God is a starry night.

The final illustration for the foundation concerns dedication and obedience (6:24). The great fault of American Christianity is that we try to mix in a little mammon with our faith. OR too often a little faith with our mammon. This simply will not do.

So we give our highest and best to God, and now we are ready to respond to trouble. According to so many teachings, in every strata of the Bible, God simply will not allow trouble to overtake you. As He provided manna daily (and only daily) He will provide a grace that is sufficient for the trouble you face this morning. There is simply no way around this immutable fact.

Our problem, in the main, is stretching our cluttered minds into the future and envisioning countless scenarios which on the one hand almost certainly will not happen, and absolutely certainly will not be beyond God’s ability to provide help. You are running a race you’ve already won.

So you will have a little or a lot of trouble today. Focus on God, take a deep breath of the Spirit, and take the hand of Jesus to get through. You will.

Grace,

Dr. Terry Ellis

May 20, 2013

“And He marveled because of their unbelief.” Mark 6:6

Some things Jesus cannot do. That’s what Mark tells us.

In the sixth chapter of his Gospel he described Jesus’ return to his hometown. As was His habit He taught in the synagogue, and the crowd was amazed at His teaching. But their amazement seems to have a different quality from the crowd’s amazement at the Sermon on the Mount. There, the people heard a message that rang true and had an authority to it. It was appealing in a deeply satisfying way.

In His own hometown, however, the crowd was offended. They did not believe this carpenter could have such insight. They had seen Him as a boy. Yes He appeared to have wisdom, and yes they had heard about the mighty works, but where did He get all of this? Maybe jealousy was the problem. Or, more likely, they simply did not want anyone coming in and upsetting their familiar religion and notions of what God is really like. Whatever the case, Jesus commented that a prophet is seldom honored in his own hometown.

Then Mark notes for us: “he could do no mighty work there except that he laid his hands on a few sick people and healed them.” He could do no mighty work there. Some things Jesus can’t do. That phrase has stuck with me since I heard it from a professor at seminary when we studied this part of the Gospel of Mark. It was Dr. Simmons who told of using this in a sermon one time only to have a man come up to him afterward, quite agitated, and claim, “there’s nothing my Jesus can’t do.”

Well, of course, that man is right on one level. Jesus, God, is able to do anything. He is omnipotent (all powerful) and sovereign (not subject to anything or anyone), but He has obviously put a limit of some nature and extent on what He will or will not do. In this story from the Gospel of Mark we clearly see that He was unwilling to force himself on anyone. He would not cross the line He had drawn. Therefore, He was unable to do a mighty work there.

The sixth verse takes us to the heart of the matter. “Jesus marveled at their unbelief.” There’s the problem. Unbelief. The word belief, of course, is the same as the word faith. They had no faith. Jesus will not enter a life unless faith has opened the door. He is not in the habit of kicking in the door. He could, but forced obedience does not produce the character He really desires. Only belief, trust and submission can produce the love God really wants from us.

Faith at its root is an openness to God. When He finds faith He performs a mighty work. When He finds unbelief, He waits. By our lack of faith, trust, and obedience we can limit what God would do in our midst.

God will bless you today. What you see and hear from Him may be meager or plentiful. It depends on faith. Be open to God. The Creator wants to reveal Himself more clearly to you today. Welcome Him in faith.

Grace,

Dr. Terry Ellis

April 29, 2013